Being careless is my way of healing.

Careless about convincing people that we, as natives of this land, have a right to exist on it. Careless about convincing anyone that we have a right to fight back. Careless about convincing anyone that we have a right to know our own worth.

It has been almost two years since I lifted a finger to convince anyone of anything.

Millions mocked our dead. They mocked maimed faces, blown-off fingers and shattered bodies after Israel's terrorist pager attacks, even when confronted with videos and photographs of babies, women and ordinary civilians who were targeted. People who were not fighters. People who were working in civilian institutions and logistics. It did not matter.

And you know what?

It still does not matter to me.

I have completely lost the desire to obsess over making people believe, understand or change their minds. If someone chooses to be blind, that is their choice. If someone chooses to stand with evil, that is their choice too.

I genuinely, wholeheartedly, do not care anymore.

That light in me has been put out. For good.

I care about my people. My community. My family. My extended family. That is it.

My people have been suffering for generations, for decades before I was even born, and through the past three years in ways I never imagined I would have to witness.

After Gaza, after the genocide we watched unfold before our eyes, after the ethnic cleansing we continue to witness in southern Lebanon, after schools and hospitals were bombed in Iran, after weddings, funerals and streets in Yemen were turned into targets by Western and Israeli fire, my threshold for caring about the world's selective outrage has simply disappeared.

Everything else feels meaningless now.

Every opinion. Every attitude. Every stranger's approval. Every argument over who is supposed to sympathize with whom.

None of it matters to me anymore.

When you see me posting, it is because of جهاد التبيين "Jihad of Calrification".

Because I believe in telling the story. Because I believe truth deserves to be told properly, clearly and without surrendering it to those who deliberately distort it.

Beyond that? I could not care less what people think. Or why they think it.

It does not matter anymore.

Honestly, it never really did but it came to me a bit late.

Next week marks two years since I quietly stepped out of this circus and chose my own peace of mind.

And I have only one goal now:

To return to my village. To rebuild.
To give my children a home there. And to spend whatever life is left to me caring about the people who actually matter.

That is my healing. That is my peace.

And I am not asking anyone to understand it.

You be you, but I will for sure be me...unapologetically.. even if it kills me.